Note: Hung over from last nights 'excursion' with Lars and Er. We are all in our own separate ruts and since we seem to have reached the bottom of the barrel, we have sought solace in the bottom of wine bottles (white: Lars and Er) and Bacardi Cola (self.) So if this bit doesn't exactly make sense, blame it on the booze still in my system, this time!
Proverbial light at end of tunnel keeps flashing on and off, impishly blinding poor self as am immersed in a thick black ink placed which is punctured sporadically by floods of white light which blink on and off in manner of strobe at a rave. Since have never dropped e (in the words of my generation - sic! not my generation but the YOUNGER generation) cannot therefore possibly find this light freak show soothing in any manner, shape or psychedelic form.
You know how they say God never shuts one door without opening another.... The lights at the end of the tunnel continue to blink epileptically - though hopefully signalling impending opportunities coming my way, as my horo / horror-scope said - as opposed to signalling that they are regrettably on the blink! (In which Case: GAAAAHHHHH!) Well, in addition to blinking lights now also have to deal with added cacophony of doors slamming open and shut throughout said metaphorical tunnel as though were in the middle of bloody storm-draught from Alaska, Siberia or similar.
All is very confusing. Perhaps Zen Master is right (damn!) and life has no meaning (double damn!)
Also, perhaps efforts of people surrounding self have come to fruition and self has finally conceded into insanity. (Can almost hear men in white coats approaching the door!)
Gaah!
Laughing hysterically, which was pretty much what we did last night, ALL night: Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha HA!
Have therefore given up making sense of anything (again, sic!) and have done the only sane thing to do under the circumstances - severe retail therapy. (Read: shopping in three countries within the span of 24 hours.) It works wonders in manner of displacement activity (believe me, I'm an expert on the matter.)
Also have read Marian Keyes Under the Duvet (as a run up to the gift which Lars and Er gave me - Further Under the Duvet) AND Lauren Weiseberger's Everyone Worth Knowing.
Great progress, therefore. Think that am holding up pretty well under the circumstances. Obviously this will all change when I get my credit card bill and the inevitable note officially informing me that the bank has put a contract out on my head, as it were. (And who can blame them?) Will be / am in BIG trouble again!
Sound of doors slamming as self walks through proverbial tunnel. Now running madly into the flashing of lights which black out and flash back on with even greater intensity.
Gaah!
Repeat mantra du jour at will:
It all works out in the end. Nobody knows how –
but it always does.
(From the film Shakespeare in Love)
