New outlook on life (sic!)

Yes, well as you can see I have changed (rather drastically - but that's me!) my blog template, as well as a number of other things in life.

Read: A change will do you good! (cf: Cheryl Crow)

Hmmm... Not so sure about the 'doing me good' bit about change. But at least it's something, no?

Am trying to make sense of a number of nonsensical happennings that have been going on at this end of the keyboard, but to no avail. (sic! what else is new?) In an attempt to clarify intense confusion that has gripped self, i have come up with the list below. (Tsk!)

Some background here: I believe that when being in the eye of a hurricane-from-hell type storm it is always best to stay very still and do nothing. Do nothing, but think and rationalise your way out of the hurricane. And we all know that the best way to clarify your thoughts are via lists. (Says who? Dunno. Just go with it. Pleeeease!) This is, I believe, what people do when in the jungle / forest they chance upon a lion / bear. The notion is clearly to pretend that nothing is out of the ordinary, thereby fooling the wild beast (with big,BIG teeth nestled in a very,VERY strong jaw) into believing that there is need to attack. Meanwhile, the beast will just wander off back to its den allowing you to escape slowly, and without making any sudden movements.

Disclaimer: This theory has not as yet been scientifically proven and the author will take no responsibility for the consequences of following the 'plan' above.

Note: If you are reading this and considering taking the author's advice, kindly seek medical attention, or even better check yourself into the funny farm. The author and her 'advice' are never, EVER to be listened to. Failure to heed this note may (and let's face it, probably will) get you in no-end of trouble!

Back to MY list...

List has been complied with same attitude used by The Bride's in Kill Bill. (Note, I said attitude, as in: I am not determined to hack people but just to get to grips with certain 'issues'. Now, if only i could swathe a Hattori Hanzo blade like that... suspect that earth would be a much better place!) Humph!

Well, here goes...

List of things that are REALLY starting to bug me:
(not in order of aggravation or priority!)

1. Situation with BIG - impossible to explain due to flippant, fickle nature of situation itself.
2. Maybe even BIG (?) - which perhaps would be a good thing in manner of a sign that self is over it and has moved on. Hmmm. Perhaps this should be stricken from the list. But now that i typed it out and all... Naaaahhhh!
3. Other people's fuck-ups affecting self's life - hmmmm better not dwell too much on this. too aggravating.
4. Self's lack of commitment to self's self-imposed goals - also better not to dwell too much on this. too depressing.
5. Failure of self to fix things - should go to some cosmic DIY lessons.
6. Failure of Zen Master to fix things - cosmic DIY lessons to be taken from someone other than the Zen Master, perhaps. (However am aware that it is ALL MY FAULT. Despite my best efforts!)
7. Self's compulsive obsession to list things - this is getting really baaaaaaadddd now!

Any advice anyone, seriously.

Better specify here. Any GOOD advice, anyone.

Seriously!